{"id":21,"date":"2014-05-14T13:23:23","date_gmt":"2014-05-14T13:23:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/wp\/?page_id=21"},"modified":"2014-10-15T11:34:15","modified_gmt":"2014-10-15T11:34:15","slug":"my-own-therapy","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/?page_id=21","title":{"rendered":"My own therapy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I am going to put onto this page a snippet from the work I did with each of five therapists. Here&#8217;s the first bit&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Vanessa<\/p>\n<p>My most memorable moment with Vanessa occurred when I was feeling particularly frustrated with this whole \u2018therapy\u2019 process.\u00a0 I had a gnawing feeling of dissatisfaction but didn\u2019t have any words to put to it.\u00a0 Having been brought up to be a nice well-behaved boy, I was often too polite to express any resentment about anything, but on this occasion I managed to be more expressive than usual.\u00a0 I let Vanessa know a bit more directly how I was fed up with the world, and, yes, fed up with her, too.<\/p>\n<p>I was talking vaguely about needs.\u00a0 I can\u2019t remember how the conversation developed, but she ending up saying \u2018I am trying to\u00a0<em>put you in touch with<\/em>\u00a0your needs\u2019.\u00a0 Well, it had never occurred to me that that was what therapy might be about, or at least, one of the important things in\u00a0<em>my\u00a0<\/em>therapy:\u00a0<em>getting in touch with my needs!<\/em><\/p>\n<p>For some people that\u2019s no problem at all: they are quite aware what their needs are, but might have some other problem, or a difficulty in tolerating the frustration of needs.\u00a0 I had been brought up to rein in my needs, hide them away or even pretend that they weren\u2019t there: if there was one biscuit left on the plate I certainly would not take it.\u00a0\u00a0 So it was a big learning point for me that needs have to be known about, acknowledged, accepted and not batted away.\u00a0 Only then can we make conscious choices about what to do with these needs, which of course we all have.\u00a0 If I don\u2019t know what my needs are, how can I possibly ask for anything?\u00a0 If I never ask for anything, I might spend my whole life waiting for good things to just turn up!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I am going to put onto this page a snippet from the work I did with each of five therapists. Here&#8217;s the first bit&#8230; Vanessa My most memorable moment with Vanessa occurred when I was feeling particularly frustrated with this whole \u2018therapy\u2019 process.\u00a0 I had a gnawing feeling of dissatisfaction but didn\u2019t have any words [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/21"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=21"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/21\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":251,"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/21\/revisions\/251"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/richardmills.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=21"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}